Some folks like a p*ssy, a budgie or a tit,
Some take up with a spaniel pup that fills up the house with [woof, woof]
Now I keep chickens and I've a favourite one,
He's my little cockerel and I don't know where he's gone.
Has anybody seen my cock, my big Rhode Island red,
He's mostly pink with a little bit of blue and purple on his head,
He stands straight up in the morning and he gives my wife a shock,
Has anybody seen, anybody seen, anybody, anybody seen my cock?
He's a stiff-necked little upstart and I've had him all my life,
He gives me pride and pleasure and a torment to my wife,
Sometimes he's magnificent and sometimes small and thin,
He puffs up like a chicken when you tickle him under his chin.
His two enormous woggles hanging down, he's the best you'll ever find,
Madam you may stroke him if you like, if you feel that way inclined,
Be careful he doesn't spit in you eye though.