The Unfortunate Man Lyrics

There once was a lawyer they called Mr. Clay.
He had but two clients and they wouldn't pay.
At last of starvation he grew so afraid,
That he courted and married a wealthy old maid.

At the wedding the lawyer made one big mistake,
'Twas not in omitting the wine or the cake.
The ring was well chosen, they had a big feed,
But the lawyer did not get a warranty deed.

He's a very unfortunate, very unfortunate, very
unfortunate man.
He's a very unfortunate, very unfortunate, very
unfortunate man.

At night in their chamber the lady arose,
And began to prepare to retire and repose,
Her husband sat near her admiring her charms,
That gave him such pleasure to hold in his arms.

She went to the washstand to bathe her fair face,
And thus she destroyed all her beauty and grace,
The rose on her cheek quickly grew very faint,
And he saw on the towel, 'twas nothing but paint.


She went to the mirror to take down her hair,
And when she had done so her scalp was all bare,
Said she: "Don't be frightened to see my bald head,
I'll put on a cap when I get into bed."

She hung her false hair on the wall on a peg,
And then she proceeded to take off her leg.
Her trembling husband got quite a surprise,
When she asked him to come and take out her glass eye.

Now all you young men who would marry for life,
Be sure to examine your intended wife,
Remember the lawyer who trusted his eyes,
And a little bit later got quite a surprise.


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Record Label(s): 2011 Master Classics Records
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