Tom Paxton Don't Be Rude To A Rhinoceros Lyrics

Don't be rude to a Rhinoceros
Don't try pushing him aside
In a cafeteria he will cause hysteria
If his face isn't dried
Give him silverware and napkins
Place them neatly on his tray
But don't be rude to a Rhinoceros
Kindly step aside and let him have his way

When a rhinoceros is cross you want to give him plenty of room
He's awfully big you know and has a monstrous horn
If you let him in the door he is gonna wreck the floor
and your mother's curtains will be torn

While he might seem awfully fascinating
It is wiser to avoid his company
For it's very hard to know when a Rhino's gonna blow
And when he does it's not a very good place to be

Don't be rude to a Rhinoceros
Don't try pushing him aside
In a cafeteria he will cause hysteria
If his face isn't dried
Give him silverware and napkins
Place them neatly on his tray But don't be rude to a Rhinoceros
Kindly step aside and let him have his way

When he decides to take a nap he's going to sleep wherever he likes
It's all the same to him he simply lays down flat
If it's in your flower bead where he lays his monstrous head
You will have some flowers going splat

You must whistle up a little folk song
To persuade him to go back to the zoo
But be careful what you grab as you help him in to a cab
For a rhinoceros you know is ticklish too

And don't be rude to a Rhinoceros
Don't try pushing him aside
In a cafeteria he will cause hysteria
If his face isn't dried
Give him silverware and napkins
Place them neatly on his tray
But don't be rude to a Rhinoceros
Kindly step aside and let him have his way

Kindly step aside and let him have his way