Jumpsteady Dungeon Master Lyrics

Welcome.
Blue wizard is about to die.
Green Elf needs food badly.

The base is thumpin' the club is jumpin'
Hot drunk girls in the corner humpin'
Booties Shakin' big titties fakin'
High five my boys as drinks we takin'
But what do we know about this nothin'
Were not even there I was only frontin'
We're in a basement roleplayin' D&D
Explorin' the land of make believe
Its kind a like reading a book anew
Except you control what the characters do
Untold adventures await your mind
As you become someone else intertwined
Some think it's nerdy that's probably true
But f*ck you it's just what we nerdies do
Allow our imagination to soar free
As our dreams here become reality

(Chorus)
All through the night sit tight
and keep on rollin' rollin'
Lookin' for that twenty
Then we know we're golden
Others go for a bite
We keep on rollin' rollin'
Order us some pizza
It disappears like Merlin

The drums are thumpin' goblins jumpin'
Were in the deepest part of the dungeon
Brave wizard stand at the rear
Throw a fireball at anything you hear
Hey thief don't bother you failed your roll
I see you in the shadows little hoe
Oh me I'm cavalier I check the doors
That's the reason they call me a hero-whore
Got a chained kobold in the lead
We call him trap tester know what I mean
Torches shakin' hit points achin'
See any kind of treasure we takin'
Dice rollin' sword glowin'
Deep in the dungeon depths we keep goin'
Hear a monster sound look around
Continue down the tunnel dumbfound
Enter a cave that reeks a foul stench
Not the place we really wanna be I bet
Then I see what I can't believe
A red dragon standin' in front of me

(Chorus)
All through the night sit tight
And keep on rollin' rollin
Lookin' for that twenty
Then we know we're golden
Others have them a life We keep on rollin' rollin'
Don't need social troubles
We're good just slayin' goblins

Pizza's here with a small cheer
Pop all around don't need any beer
Nerdy boy what's your joy
Likes to collect action figure toys
Knight to rook comic books
To the hobby store like crack you're hooked
Robotech cyber sex
On line game until you're flexed
Wrath of Khan, Obi-Wan
Collectible cards and Megatron
These are things nerdies do
Of course we like to roleplay too
Haven't faced a dragon in awhile
Nerdies at the table get kinda wild
Mr. DM what's the deal
A red dragon are you for real
We're only 3rd level don't you know
And currently hit points are low
From the DM comes a wicked laugh
"Roll initiative guys time for the bloodbath"

(Chorus)
All through the night sit tight
And keep on rollin' rollin'
Lookin' for that twenty
Then we know we're golden
Others go out at night
We keep on rollin' rollin'
Don't need to spend money
We need our medication
All through the night sit tight
And keep on rollin' rollin'
Lookin' for that twenty
Then we know we're golden
Others have them a wife
We keep on rollin' rollin'
We are not true virgins
Get plenty elven neden

A huge fireball suddenly appears
And strikes the dragon like a bombardier
Yo wizard "Eh" think you best retire
Don't you know a red dragons immune to fire
"Oh shit my bad he looks kinda mad
That's my last spell cheerio lad"
The others run smart thing to do
But I'm a cavalier and I'm not allowed to
Unsheathe my Wicked Chaos Blade
The dragon's roar begins the rampage
Sound allowed a blood curdling battle cry
Close the gap to suicide
Leap attack as I gracefully glide
Attempting to strike it's scaly hide
"Take that" damn rolled a one
My blade falls thats it I'm done

Mmmmm...Toasty..