Geoff Berner Widow Bride Lyrics

My son, you have been so unwise
You forgot to ask for my advice
If you wanna have a happy life
Get yourself a widow bride
Get yourself a widow bride

'Cause a widow bride has everything
Her husband couldn't take with him
A widow bride knows how to do
Things you don't know how to teach her to
You don't know how to teach her to
You don't know how to teach her to
You don't know how to teach her to

If you want a happy life
Get yourself a widow bride

King David was a horny king
Saw a subject that he was interested in
But her husband was a soldier fine
So he put him in the front of the battle line
Put him right in the front of the battle line
He put him in the front of the battle line

And the new queen, she had everything
Her husband couldn't take with him
The new queen, she knew how to do Things you don't know how to teach her to
You don't know how to teach her to
You don't know how to teach her to
You don't know how to teach her to

If you want a happy life
Get yourself a widow bride

My great-grandfather was seduced
By Victoria and the language that she used
She said "I'm looking for a strong young man
To help me with these virgin lands"
She said that they were virgin lands
She said that they were virgin lands

But Saskatchewan had everything
Her husband couldn't take with him
Saskatchewan knew how to do
Things you don't know how to teach her to
You don't know how to teach her to
You don't know how to teach her to

If you want a happy life
Get yourself a widow bride

Get yourself a widow bride
Get yourself a widow bride
Get yourself a widow bride!