Dr. John Cabbage Head Lyrics

I come home the first night, drunk as I could be
And there was a mule in the stable, where my mule orta
be
I asked my wife, my pretty little wife, explain this
thing to me
How come there's a mule in the stable, where my mule
orta be?

Well, you old fool, you drunken fool, can't you plainly
see
That's nothin' but a milk cow my granny gave to me?
Well, I've traveled the whole world over, ten thousand
miles and more
And a saddle and a bridle on a milk cow I ain't never
seen before

Well, I come home the second night, drunk as I could be
And there was a hat on the hat rack, where my hat orta
be
I asked my wife, my pretty little wife, explain this
thing to me
How come there's a hat on the hat rack, where my hat
orta be?

Well, you old fool, you drunken fool, can't you plainly
see
That's nothin' but a chamber pot my granny gave to me?
Well, I've traveled the whole world over, ten thousand
miles and more
And a John B. Stetson chamber pot I ain't never seen
before Well, I come home the third night, drunk as I could be
And there was a pair of pants, where my pants orta be
I asked my wife, my pretty little wife, explain this
thing to me
How come these pants on the chair, where my pants orta
be?

Well, you old fool, your drunken fool, can't you
plainly see
That's nothin' but a dish rag my granny gave to me?
Well, I've traveled the whole world over, ten thousand
miles and more
And a ... zipper on a dish rag I ain't never seen
before

Well, I come home the last night, drunk as I could be
And there was a head on the pillow, where my head orta
be
I asked my wife, my pretty little wife, explain this
thing to me
How come there's a head on the pillow, where my head
orta be?

Well, you old fool, you drunken fool, can't you plainly
see
That's nothin' but a cabbage head my granny gave to me?
Well, I've traveled the whole world over, ten thousand
miles and more
And a moustache on a cabbage I ain't never seen before!