I came in as the sun came up
She glared at me over her coffee cup
She said "Where you been?"
So I thought real hard and said
"I fell asleep in that hammock in the yard"
She said "You don't know it but you just blew it"
I said "Well that's my story and I'm stickin' to it"
That's my story (that's my story)
Oh that's my story (that's my story)
No I ain't got a witness, I can't prove it but
That's my story and I'm stickin' to it
Well I got that deer in the headlights look
She read my face like the cover of a book she said
"Don't expect me to believe all that static
'Cause just last week I threw that hammock in the attic"
My skin got so thin you could see right through it
And I stuttered "Well that's my story and I'm stickin' to it"
The time comes when a wise man knows
That the best thing that he can do
Is just look her in the eye and beg for mercy
And face the bitter truth
"Well honey me and the boys played cards all night
There wasn't no hanky panky not a woman in sight
And I know I shoulda called and baby I'm real sorry
But get a cellular phone and then you won't have to worry
You know how much I love you darlin' and I'm ready to prove it
And that's my story and I'm stickin' to it"
I ain't gonna do a thing darlin' unless you approve it
And that's my story and I'm stickin' to it