Bob Rivers Chat Room Lyrics

('Well, hello, Mickey17 here.')
('I'm uh, 17 years old.')
('Yeah, tall, blonde hair, blue eyes. People tell me I look like one of the Backstreet Boys.')
('Which one? Uh, Huey or maybe Dewey'.)
('I'd like to meet you too. What are you doing in 8 to 10 years?')

It was dark in my room
Like an ancient tomb
'cept the monitor burnin' bright
I was tryin' to meet girls on the internet
But I hadn't had a doggone bite

I was looking for love at 56K
Typin' smut from town to town
Said 'I'm a twenty-two year old college coed
And I'm about to pull my panties down.'

'Cuz were in a little chat room
Typing through the night
My left hands' on my mouse and
I'm tickling the keys with my right
Come on and join our chat room
Who you wanna to be today?
Thoughts go around this chat room
Anything's okay

Chat room
Chat room

('Well! What a coincidence. I am a lesbian too.') By the time the sun was comin' up
I'd met girls from all 50 states
Typin' 40 words a minute with just one hand
So the other could co-allate

Yeah, them keys was humming
Like a Whitehouse intern
Toying with a chick in Belair
But the truth made me sick
She sent me a pic
And it had a lot of mustache hair

'Cuz we're in a great big chat room
Typing through the night
Got me a chat room pen pal
Hope she's a beautiful sight
Come on and join our chat room
Who you gonna meet today
Try your luck in the chat room
Across the cyberspace

Chat Room
Chat Room
Chat Room'

('I received your jpeg. Please resend. The photo appears to have smudged. It looks like you have a mustache'Hahaha LOL.')
('Perhaps we could meet in a more private room?')
('Back door?')
('Chip, is that you? You get your ass to bed before I come up there and disconnect your mo-dem!')