Jack Vids For Cash Lyrics

Yo yo yo
We makin jack vids for cash, see
Go go
We gettin paid to get nasty
Yo, go
I like to jack it really fast, see
But whoa whoa whoa
You better make that nut last, chief

This is the story of my very first job
Fifteen years old when I met Mr. Bob
A creepy motherf*cker, f*cking loved what he did
He'd tape my dick and then go sell the vid
Jacking off on tape and getting paid by the hour
When I jack off, I like to lean like the tower
Of Pisa, I like to lean and pick my knees up
It's very uncomfortable but it makes a dude cum fast
Ease up on that bottle, you better make that rub last
Cuz I ain't doin this shit if I get sober
Reality hits you and you numb like some Novocaine

Okay, get out of my way because I'm young, drunk and horny
Gonna go to LA so I can jack off on Carnie Wilson
And then weigh it on the Nielsen Rating Scale My dick is very pale
But it still gets hard and shoots cum like a mother
Shot a load so fat it left the Smothers Brothers covered in sperm
Now everybody green like Kermit within me, the pit within me

A cum shooting plant that I bought from your aunt
At the farmer's market
Take a sip and cork it
My cum, it flows like wine
On Hollywood and Vine
I'm jacking off on corners
My cum drop splatter on the curb big as quarters
You can read the story in the Hollywood Reporter
Or in syndication on the web via Reuters (the web via Reuters)
Some of our favorite stories break via Reuters
Come to my house if you lookin for a snack, kid
We can eat chips while we watch one of my jack vids

Yo yo yo
We makin jack vids for cash, see
Go go
We gettin paid to get nasty
And that's real

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