Pissed Jeans Cold Whip Cream Lyrics

Nervous and excited with all these thoughts running through your head
Lying awake in bed
Ever since a teen wondering when you'd finally catch a smell
But what if you go to hell?

So speak up and have your say
Yes you've got the pressures of being straight

For years just wondering what it's like on the other end
But you're worried she won't peg
Tried a couple times solo but you never fully went
What if she leaves a dent?

But the worst thing you could ever do
Is deceive yourself, sexually untrue
Cause you're not getting off on lies
Just tell her about that thing you wanna try Where you twist it, stuff it, roll it to the floor
A universe waits behind that door

Dessert follows dinner but you're still not fully fed
It's not your kinda spread
Thought about that cold whip cream
And where you'd put it instead
So buttered, you might as well be bread

But the worst thing you could ever do
Is deprive yourself, pink turning to blue
Cause you're not getting off tonight
Unless you tell her about that thing you wanna try
Where you pinch it, cuff it, slap it in the nose
And if you don't know, well now you know
Now you know