Pinkard & Bowden The Universal Adjective Song Lyrics

I guess I must've learned that word
When I was just a child
But how the f*ck would I know
It would drive my teachers wild
It just seemed so descriptive
When I read it off the wall
I shouted it in the classroom
And had to stand in the f*ckin' hall

You know that I refined its use
When I was in the Navy
I learned to eat defensively
And say "Pass the f*ckin' gravy"
They taught me how to f*ck around
And live it up on leave
The ways I've learned to use that word
You wouldn't f*ckin' believe

Oh the universal adjective is
f*ckin' up my life
f*ckin' up my life (Yeah)
f*ckin' up my life I lost so many friends
I even lost my f*ckin' wife
The universal adjective is
f*ckin' up my life

I was sittin' in a bar one night
All f*cked up on tequila
My wife comes in all f*ckin' mad
Says "I'll f*ckin' see ya"
I really didn't understand
Just what the f*ck she meant
Until she took me into court
And she took every f*ckin' cent

(Sing along)
Oh the universal adjective is
f*ckin' up my life
f*ckin' up my life (Yeah)
f*ckin' up my life
I lost so many friends
I even lost my f*ckin' wife
The universal adjective is
f*ckin' up my life