The Asshole Anthem Lyrics

{Intro - From Commando Film]
Cooke: "f**k you asshole!"
Matrix: "f**k you asshole."

[Hook] [x2] (Ani DiFranco - Used To You)
I'm still here because I got nothing else to do
You're an asshole but I'm getting used to you
I like the fact that you talk incessantly
I got a thing for assholes who tell good stories

[Verse 1:]
I'm an asshole
That's why I'm singing it
I wanna f**k your asshole and stick a finger in it
Grab my pole, ho
Suck the head out
I'm mad cold, bitch
f**k or get out!
I'm not your friend
Unless you're my f**k buddy
You got your period?
I'll f**k you bloody
Study the tactics of an asshole
It takes practice to mack like this
You're just an average, frustrated chump
Dumb bastard
Masturbating hump
Telling her she's beautiful is unsuitable
You're better off calling her a doodie bowl
Negative shit will get you in bed with her quicker
f**k with her head, women are sick
I might not put any work in
While your jerkin' me off
Suckin', your neck hurtin'
I don't cum quick so I might not squirt for an hour
from now
I admit it I'm a jerk
Check my Blackberry while you slurp
Show you no respect cause you're a herpes lurch
Using teeth
Wack head game
So I smack you and choke you into the bed frame
You like the way I keep shit hard & gutter
Cause you're a pussy fart cutter


[Verse 2]
When you stick your bum out
You make me wanna dumb out
If I'm an asshole
You're the shit that comes out
You want fake D-cups?
Street puppies
A mansion?
f**k you!
Give me a pre-nup
Before she gets half of the math
I'll cut her in half and laugh
Divorce her from her torso
The art of seduction
Her private parts in conjunction
I'm trying to f**k skins
Like Beecher
You're a herb
Lonely male
I'll teach you the proverbial Holy Grail
A female creature
Treat ya the way you teach her to teach ya
Don't be frail
My nuggets of wisdom
You always like it rugged[?]
Chugging down buckets of jism
I'll f**k you like a thug in prison
Make you suck it like a slut organism
Got love sick female stalkers
They love dick
Treat 'em like streetwalkers in public
Realize this
Women are prizes
I want mine, nice thighs, large size tits
Don't be a sucker
There's beautiful women everywhere
Ready to pucker
At the coffee shop, the office, the gym or the street
Lookin' to meet
Go find her and f**k her


"You're an asshole, man."

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