Got thrown and trampled by the biggest f*ckin' bull you'd ever seen,
Gouched me eye out crushed me balls and ripped me f*ckin' spleen,
Covered in mud and blood and guts slid underneath the fence,
And when I finally focused with me one good eye, Sheila, you were
Lost one eye and crushed me balls but Sheila, you were there.
And I remember the first time I ever got you drunk cheap wine in the
back'a me ute,
You got the hic-cups laughin' and fartin' and all I wanted was a root,
But I only ever got to kiss you that night at the gate when I dropped
Stuck me tongue in your mouth you hic-cupped again nearly bit the
Seems like a long time ago you know but Sheila, you were there.
And what about the engagement party, 'til you announced out loud,
Your menstrual cycle blew a tire and you were up the spout
Your ol' man chased me with a chainsaw, cut me arm off up to here,
Chainsaw hadn't'a run out'a juice there'd be bits'a me everywhere,
Then he tried to stab me with the f*ckin' thing but Sheila, you were
And who'd have forget the weddin' day, the wind the rain the sleet,
And how's your timin' breakin' your water when your ol' man was
makin' his speech,
The ambulance slipped and spun you dropped your bundles f*ckin'
lucky I'm not dead,
Doc dropped his glasses drunken bastards hacked off me f*ckin' leg,
Yeah you talk about startin' off on the wrong foot, Sheila, you were
Yeah and it's hard to raise a mongrel kid when you're balancin' on
And he sneaks up on your glass eye side and you can't catch the
cunt to hit him
That kid crashed me tractor, sold me car crew wacky weed back'a
Coppers come 'round burnt the joint to the ground never seen that
f*ckin' kid again,
Yeah we lost the lot when he f*cked off but Sheila, you were there.
So out I went out back rabbit trap, anything to make a quid,
Was takin' a crap when a rabbit trap snapped and hacked off the
knob'a me dick,
Then that stupid mongrel dog'a your's went and buried me knob
I reckon you know where he buried it too 'cause Sheila, you were
Yeah just turned around and me donger was gone but Sheila, you
So here I am minus the knob'a me cock me eye me leg and an arm,
And after bustin' me balls and losin' me nan aw, not to mention the
Now the doc tells me that me dick is f*cked, and I ain't got long to
And in me final hours, Sheila, you're still here,
Yeah should'a known you'd be there when I go, Sheila, you were
Now I'm fightin' for me last breath as we bid our last farewells,
Can you move a little closer Sheila there's somethin' I gotta tell ya,
You're kneelin' on me oxygen hose and cuttin' off me air,
You're f*ckin' bad luck you f*ckin' old slut so f*ck off out'a here,
You've been hangin' around like a bad smell for, uhh, f*ckin' years,
You're f*ckin' bad luck you f*ckin' old slut so f*ck off out'a here.
Uhh, uh, uhh, uh, uhh, uh, uhh, uh, uhh, uh uhh.