John Kander Kansasland Lyrics

So let's follow the yellow brick road in the wrong
direction, all the way
back to "Kansasland."
Sasha yee ha!

COME EVERY SECOND SUNDAY
OF EACH MONTH THROUGHOUT THE YEAR
THE WOMEN FOLK HEAD OUT FROM TOWN
TO GREET THE SOLDIERS HERE

WE BRING THEM HOME COOKED VITTLES!

YEAH, THAT's ALL THESE LADIES SHARE

THERE AIN't NO CHANCE FOR ROMANCE
WHEN THE DANCE IS STRICTLY SQUARE!

IN KANSASLAND
IN THE STRAW, WE NEVER STRAY
'CUZ IN KANSASLAND
YOU CAN't BE TOO GOOD IN THE HAY
IN KANSASLAND
DON't SHAKE THE SASSAFRASS!
BUT IN KANSASLAND
THERE's LOTS OF SPLENDOR IN THAT GRASS!

THESE LADIES SWEAR THE GOOD BOOK
IS THE ONE BOOK THEY BELIEVE
YET THINK ABOUT WHEN ADAM FOUND
HIMSELF ALONE WITH EVE THERE WARN't NO PREACHER PRESENT
WHEN HE GAVE HIS MATE A WHIRL . . .
BUT WHERE'D WE BE IF EVE HAD NOT BEEN --
MMM -- THAT KIND OF GIRL?

IN KANSASLAND
WHERE THE PRAIRIE MEETS THE SKY . . .
IN KANSASLAND
AIN't NO FINER PLACE TO LIVE AND DIE
THAN KANSASLAND
YOUR VIRTUE NEVER FADES
'CUZ IN KANSASLAND
WE'RE ALWAYS SURE TO PULL THE SHADES!

(ENTER BAMBI as PRINCESS KICKAPOO.)

THERE CAME TO OLD FORT HENDERSON
YOUNG PRINCESS KICKAPOO!

WOO-WOO-WOO!

WHO KEPT HER WIGWAM WARM AT NIGHT
WITH EVERY SIOUX SHE KNEW!
HER TRIBAL DANCE IS WORTH A GLANCE
HER HIPS GO POW-WOW-WOW!
WHEN THIS PAPOOSE SAYS:

"LET's VAMOOSE!"

THE SOLDIERS CRY:

"AND HOW!"