Billy Cobb Send This To Your Crush Without Any Context Lyrics

I remember when i first met you
Your hair was so sweet and soft
I just wanted to cut it off and take it home with me
We had a playdate at the playground with our friend Tim
But he got in the nice mans van where, candy was offered to him
And he left with the two of us together
Sexual tensions were so high wait nevermind this was us as children
And now that i think of it singing about childhood love as an adult is kind of pedophilic so im just going to have to jump ahead a couple years
Ohh
Do you remember when we first kissed?
I was so nervous that i nearly missed that was a Nickleback refrence
And do you remember the time your mom got her hair stuck in the garbage disposal while washing dishes so we had no other choice than to scalp her with fisher price scissors And the time you left the stove on and the cat lit itself on fire and its smoldering corpse burned down the rest of the house
And to cheer you up i went to the store and i bought you some socks then you told me you were cheating on me
So i tried to do the science to find out why you would do this to me and all i got was evidence that the US moon landing was fake
I suppose there's things more important like why are so many schools being shot up in America like seriously and i'm worried about a girl so i should probably just stop