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I said a bad word when I was a kid Mamma said that I'd be sorry for the sin that I did My daddy whooped me and the preacher said shame And I tried like hell to change.
[Chorus:] But I cuss, I smoke, I laugh at dirty jokes The minor voices, man I know 'em well I've closed down bars, I've lusted in my heart My ex's think I ougta burn in hell But the devil he won't notice when I die Don't you figure he's got bigger fish to fry.
Politicians taking pork barrel bribes Crooked CEOs are getting off with no time Christmas Eve burglers stealing good children's toys, (can't say Christmas) Holiday burglers stealing good children's toys.
[Chorus:] I cuss, I smoke, I laugh at dirty jokes The minor voices, man I know 'em well I've closed down bars, I've lusted in my heart My ex think I ougta burn in hell But the devil won't even notice when I die Yeah don't you figure he's got bigger fish to fry.
Yeah there's gonna be bonfire burning An everlasting barbecue. But with all the bad stuff going on There ain't gonna be room for me and you.
'Cause we cuss, we smoke, ee laugh at Tater's jokes. [Spoken] Tell one Jim. You know you're old when your wife says honey let's run upstairs and make love And your answer is "I cannot do both." The minor voices, man we know 'em well We've closed down bars, we've lusted in our hearts Our ex's think we ougta burn in hell But the devil he won't notice when we die Hey, don't you figure he's got bigger fish to fry
Yeah, don't you figure he's got bigger fish to fry Pass the tartar sauce.
When we all get to heaven what a day of rejoicing it will be...
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