The Apology Of The Thai Drug Runner Lyrics

Drugs are f*cking fun, pal:
Factor that f*cking in
To your Drug O-f*cking-fensive
Type health f*cking warnin'.

There ain't a lot that's fun, pal:
Old age, and school, and dreams
Of a life that will never be;
Sexless nights; wasted schemes;

Your horizon still receding,
Speeding hope that's fruitless;
A sudden cliff; and skidding;
Then descent to twisted rest.

The Sacred Temple of the Emerald Buddha -
Serene and total peace.

I could'a stayed at home, pal,
And lived a joyless life -
But where the f*ck's the fun in that?
Superannuation, wife -

The whole f*cking package?!
For me, it never suited.
A softcock life and limp death?
Go get f*cking rooted!

There might be fun in poetry,
And art, and bein' literate;
It never hit the spot for me,
Nor you, though you won't admit to it.

The Sacred Temple of the Emerald Buddha -
Hear the distant gong beat.
You say you got a Ph D?
Well, good for you, my son.
How smart you f*cking need to be
To work out that drugs are fun?

Have a f*cking bash, pal -
Take this suspect load
And give to a mate of mine,
Lives on the Pat Pong Road.

You ever felt the warming waves
In the Gulf of old Siam?
Ever wanted to ever be
A different f*cking man?

The Sacred Temple of the Emerald Buddha -
Foil parcels in my teeth.

You need to hear the Mekong flood -
It's an awesome f*cking sound.
Take this package - quickly pal,
They've come to chain me down.

They bolt me to a concrete floor -
Don't get all moral, son:
There's sixty of us goes in here,
We all think drugs are fun.

50 years in a Thailand hell -
20 grams of smack up my arse.
Why? Cos drugs are f*ckin' fun:
Why the f*ck you need to ask?

The Sacred Temple of the Emerald Buddha -
Did a deal at the fat guy's feet.

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