HALF MAN HALF BISCUITAsparagus Next Left Lyrics
We've just been performing a guerrilla gig
In the middle of another group's guerrilla gig
Well surely that's the ultimate guerrilla gig
But still they cried like girls
Road signs on our country lanes
May not be what they seem
â€œAsparagus Next Leftâ€ â€“ who says?
I've been upstream
Going down there for plum tomatoes
That's not a good idea
For â€œHorse Manure 200 Yardsâ€
Read bottomless perdition
When the club-versus-country dispute arose
Small children were trampled in the exodus
We all knew someone at primary school
Who had a very powerful magnet
â€œThis-a-way For New Potatoesâ€
An arrow points innocently
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Dirt track to a darker place
That's what it says to me
â€œLast Chance For Hanging Basketsâ€
They're even giving you clues!
â€œFresh Broad Beans and Auberginesâ€
Euphemisms, Audrey, euphemisms!
Whatever happened to the plumber's van?
The humble, amateur Transit van?
Vans have become ridiculous
With their strategies and logistics
â€œVeer Left For Marmalade!â€
I don't think so Joe
And why are â€œTractors Turningâ€?
We really ought to know
So stay alert on the minor roads
Remember Phyllis Triggs
Oooh! Rhubarb! Lets go!
She's still not been accounted for
these lyrics are submitted by kaan
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