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The Old Philosopher
Eddie Lawrence

EDDIE LAWRENCE


The Old Philosopher Lyrics

Hiya folks.
Ya say ya lost your job today?
Ya say its 4 A.M. and your kids ain't home from school
yet?
Ya say your wife went out for a corned
beef sandwich last weekend - the corned beef sandwich
came back but she didn't?
Ya say your furniture is out all over the sidewalk
'cause ya can't pay the rent and ya got chapped lips
and paper cuts and your feets all
swollen up and blistered from pounding the pavement
looking for work?

Is that whats troubling ya, fellow?

REFRAIN

Well, lift your head up high and take a walk in the sun
with dignity and stick-to-it-ness and ya show the
world, ya show the world where to get off.
You'll never give up, never give up, never give
up...that ship!

Hey there, friend.
Ya say your radiators never worked all winter and now
that its summer they started up again and ya can't turn
them off?
Ya say your wife sent your light weight suits to the
cleaners and that means you'll have to wear your itchy
tweeds this morning when they say it'll hit 106 and ya
gotta meet an important business man in an hour and
your bridge just broke and ya pasted it together with
bubble gum and ya hope it don't
fall apart while you're doing some fast talking to this
man?
And - and your shoelace just busted and ya opened a big
cut on your cheek trying to
even out your sideburns and your daughter's going out
with a convict and your wife just confessed she gave
your last sixty dollars as a deposit on an airplane
hanger?
Is that whats troubling ya, friend?

REFRAIN

Hey there, cousin. Ya say ya can't pull your car out of
the mud and you're in the middle of nowhere and its
pouring rain and ya can't get the top back up and your
paycheck's all blurred and your foot went right through
the gas and your girl's screaming bloody murder; shes
scared of the dark and a stroke of lightning splits
your motor in half and your suits shrinking up fast and
ya start up the windy road on foot and sixty yards
barbed wire hits ya right smack in the puss and ya both
fall down in the mud and then a wild animal comes over
and runs away with your shoes and your car blows up
suddenly and your windshield-wiper ends up in your
mouth and ya can't move and the mud's rising up to your
nostrils and you're sinking fast and ya don't hear your
girl screaming anymore?
Is that what's on your mind, cousin?

REFRAIN

And now, this is the old philosopher saying, so long,
folks.

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these lyrics are submitted by kaan
Record Label(s): 2011 Comedy Classics
Official lyrics by

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